God is always on our side

I was tired, but the Lord stood at my side.

I had sinned, but the Lord stood at my side. 

I was unworthy, but the Lord stood at my side.

Broken.

Beaten. 

Overwhelmed.

Overcome.

But the Lord stood at my side.

There is nothing that can separate us from God.

Nothing that is too much for Him to bear. 

God wants to take our anxiety, our fears, our distress.

But we refuse to give it to Him.

We want to fix it.

We want to be in charge. 

We want to prove we don't need anyone.

That we got his.

And sometimes we just want to clean ourselves up before we go to Him.

Wipe off our faces.

Smooth our clothes.

Brush our hair.

We don't want God to see us like this.

Dirty.

Disgusting.

Disheveled.

But we forget that God already sees us.

He already knows.

And He already willingly paid the price with the Blood of His Son.

No matter what we're facing.

What enemy is against us.

What demon is tormenting us.

God is right there. 

By our side.

Wanting us to trust Him. 

Wanting to give us His strength.

We can't do this life alone.

No one can. 

God is waiting. 

What are we waiting for?

The Lord is with us

We're surrounded by bad news. 

But the Lord is with us.

The enemy is near. 

But the Lord is with us.

We've grown weary in the fight. 

But the Lord is with us. 

No matter the battle.

No matter the news.

No matter the circumstance.

The Lord is with us.

When the night grows dark. 

When our faith has diminished.

When our tears keep falling. 

The Lord is there.

Fulfilling His promise.

Offering us hope.

There will be moments when it seems we should give up. 

When everything seems pointless.

When all seems lost. 

But life is never what it seems. 

And the Lord is never more than a breath away. 

The news may sound bad. 

The enemy may have surrounded. 

The darkness may feel like it will never end. 

But the Lord will overcome it all.

No matter how hard. 

No matter how long. 

No matter what we face.

We can't give up.

We can't give in. 

We can't lose hope.

The world will try to defeat us.

That's a guarantee.

But our trust should not be in this world. 

And so, on our knees, we seek God out.

On our knees, we change our perspective. 

On our knees, we build up our faith. 

With our tears and with our prayers, we give it all to Him.

We are in a battle. We know it.

And we are weary of the fight. 

But God does not grow weary.

God does not give up.

God does not give in.

He stands ready.

To defend.

To protect.

To comfort.

The enemy has been trying to distract us. 

To get us to turn our backs on God. 

But we see it now. We've caught on.

We were fooled for a minute, but not anymore. 

Our faith is tired, Lord, it's so very tired. 

And we can't do this alone. 

So we look to you. 

We're standing on your Word.

We're asking you to save us. 

And we believe this one thing. 

The world has tried to destroy us, it has done its very best, 

but you Lord are still with us,

and you will carry us through. 

 

Is God's Word enough for us?

Remember Moses? God wanted him to go to Pharaoh on His behalf. But Moses didn't want to go. He didn't feel like he was the right person for the job. And so, he questioned God.    

But God, who I am that I should go?

But God, what if they don't believe me?

But God, what if they don't listen to me?

But God. 

But God. 

But God.

God was performing miracles right in front of him. He was showing him the impossible was possible.

He was reassuring every doubt. He promised to be with him.

But despite it all, Moses still doubted.  

You would think God appearing in a burning bush would be enough.

You would think Him turning a staff into a snake would be enough.

You would think His every Word would be enough. 

But it wasn't enough for Moses.

God was standing right in front of him. Asking him to believe. Asking him to trust Him. 

"I will be with you," He promised.

And yet Moses still needed more.

It's easy to read that account in the Bible and call him crazy. "How much more did he need?" we ask.

But if we're honest, most of us are just like him. 

We need more too.

God will provide an opportunity and we hesitate.

"Are you sure, God?"

"Isn't there someone better, Lord?" 

When faced with using our faith, we question God as much as Moses did. 

"Why are you asking me to do, what I am not able to do?" 

The question from Moses becomes the question from us. 

And God answers from His place of promise.   

Abraham wasn't able, He reminds us.   

Joseph wasn't able. 

David wasn't able.  

Sarah.

Ruth.

Mary.

None of them were able.

But none of them stopped at what they weren't able to do.  

In the most uncertain moments of their lives, God asked them to believe. 

That though they weren't able, He was.  

And now He asks us the same.

When we're faced with hard moments. When we're overcome with doubt.

When we're scared.

When it's too hard. When it's too much.

When we don't want to do what God is asking us to do.

Will we still do it? 

Will we trust Him anyway?

Will we listen to the promise of God's Word?

And will His Word be enough for us?

 

God took my mom

God took my mom. 

When I was 6 years old and knew nothing about life. 

Before I had a chance to know her. Long before I would have a way to remember her. 

He took her. 

And I grew up never having a mother.

If God can see all, if God knows all, if God is in control...did He not think I would want a mom? 

Or deserved a mom? 

Or needed a mom? 

Did He not care how painful it would be? Did He not care how awful it would feel? 

Did He not care about me at all?

Because I thought when you loved someone you wanted the best for them. You sacrificed for them. You made sure you did everything in your power to help them.

And it didn't feel like God helped me. It felt like He punished me.

And I had no idea why. 

I just knew I hated it. 

And there were moments that I hated Him. 

When you're little, no one comes up to you and tells you it's going to be ok. 

Most don't come up to you at all. 

Because people shrink from talking about death. 

They don't know what to say so they don't say anything. 

And that just makes you feel like you shouldn't talk about it either. 

So you just smile. And say you're good. And keep your hurt inside. 

And hope no one notices how different you are.

If I could only talk to my younger self now. If I could only have a moment to pull her aside and let her know she would be ok. That she would grow up to be strong. And compassionate. And capable.

If I could only let her know, that this pain would become what made her never go to bed mad. That it would make her not be scared to tell people they were important. 

That she would never shy away from telling people she loved them. Or be worried what people thought because she insisted on hugging. And looking for the good.  

If I could only have a moment to tell her that this loss would become what pushed her to make sure people knew, especially young people, that they could overcome hard things too. And that her greatest joy would be to find opportunities to cheer them on. 

If I could just talk to her and tell her to hold her head up. That God had not punished her. 

That God had not let her down.

And that God would walk with her each step of the way without her mom. 

I can't go back to tell her, but I can make sure to never forget.

How my greatest pain became my greatest purpose.  

And I can make sure to pass the message on. 

If you're facing a loss. 

If you're feeling like God has taken someone away from you.

If you're mad. If you're doubtful. 

If you're in the middle of hating God.

I'm here to tell you to hold on to hope. To surround yourself with people who remind you of the good. To believe your loved one is not gone, that they live on in you. That their life may have ended here, but it has not ended entirely. That their heart still beats inside of you. Their goodness still lives on inside of you. That each breath you take is a living testimony to a love that never ends. That they don't have to be here to make a difference. That your life is the difference they make now.

So choose kindness. For them.

Choose gratefulness. For them.

Choose forgiveness. For them.

And most of all, choose to go on living. For them.

Because even on the days it doesn't feel like it. 

Even in the moments you don't care. 

God loves you.  

I know the pain is hard.

I know it. 

But there is a bigger picture we will never see.

And a bigger plan we will never know.

I used to think the truth was that God had punished me.

That He took my mom from me. 

But the truth was my mom was God's child before she was my mom.

He loved her first.

He didn't take her from me. 

She wasn't my belonging.

She was His blessing.  

And though it took me awhile I realized, His blessing never left. 

It still remains.

And I promise one day you will see,

that it remains for you too.  

 

don't give up

don't give up.
though you're tired of fighting,
tired of falling down,
tired of wondering why life has to be so hard,
don't do it.
don't throw in the towel.
don't surrender to the struggle.

don't let what you think is the worst moment of your life,
become the last moment of your life.

refuse to let today defeat you.
refuse to let today define you.

refuse to let what the world says about you be the only thing you hear. 

don't let the pain be the only thing you see.

today you are alive.
today you are breathing.
today you may be hanging on by a thread,
but you're still hanging on.

that is not an accident.
that is not a coincidence.
that is not by chance.

God has you.

He's got you.
He's not letting go.

so hold on.

hold on tight.
and keep your eyes on Him.

because you may be in for the fight of your life...
but you are not in the fight alone. 



"For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do. But our eyes are on You." 2 Chronicles 20:12

you've walked a million steps away from God

we're all broken

we all want to run from being broken.

we want the good heart.

the one with no tears.

the one that hasn't been hurt.

we want the shiny one.

the one that sparkles.

the one that still looks new.

we don't want the one that looks bent. 

the one that looks bruised.

we definitely don't want the one that looks broken.

because we don't see beauty in broken.

we don't see anything worthy or anything good in something that doesn't look whole.

but the truth is God can fix broken.

God can take the very worst part of our lives and turn it into something wonderful.

God can take the dark and give it new light.

He can take our scars and turn them into something sacred.

the world wants us to believe that brokenness is final.

that our story ends there.

but what the world won't tell us is that brokenness is often a great beginning.

it is often the start of who we are meant to be. 

we're all broken.

every single one of us.

no one goes through life without getting hurt.

no one walks without pain.

but we choose how that pain defines us.

we can choose to only see the bad.

or we can search for the good.

and if we search for it we will find it.

that's why we tell our stories. 

that's why we share our hope.

because if someone can see that we fell down, that we were in a pit, 
that we thought we were going to drown and God saved us,

then they can find the hope that God will save them too. 

broken hearts have this beautiful way of shining for others to find their way. 

and it's a light that shines brightest because it knows the depth of the dark. 

God is still waiting on us...what are we waiting for?

I had a conversation with a man who almost died from a bad habit he was still trying to shake even 10 years later. I couldn't understand, with all the chances God had given him to get it right, how he was still making the same bad choices. And then God, in His infinite wisdom, reminded me of how I was no different than the man I was quick to find fault with...  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szr0HBfp8A8

God can take what looks dead and give it new life

months ago i saw that i let my store bought bag of potatoes go bad.

again.

they were soft and sprouting everywhere. i grabbed the bag and headed for the dumpster.

in my mind they were no good.

worthless.

garbage.

on my way out one of the ladies that works with us saw me.

"where are you going with those?" she asked.

"i'm throwing them away," i told her, "they're rotten."

"they're not rotten," she said as she took the bag from my hands, "they're perfect."

"perfect for what?" I asked.

"for planting," she told me.

over the next couple of days we got the ground ready and we planted those old potatoes. i didn't see

much hope in them but i did it anyway. as the plants grew my doubts grew as well. they didn't look like

much. in fact they looked pretty ragged.

but we watered them. and weeded them. and watched them.

and we waited.

as i was digging through the dirt at harvest time i was amazed.

there were potatoes everywhere.

and i couldn't help but think about the miracle.

how God took those old worn out potatoes and produced new ones.

how He took what looked like garbage and made it into something with value.

how He took what i wanted to throw away and showed me it still had purpose.

and so it is with the world and how we treat the people in it.

we're quick to toss out. quick to discard. quick to throw away.

we're quick to label. quick to decide who is no good. quick to decide who is worthless.

but just like those potatoes, we are wrong.

because God is able to water and weed and watch.

He can take those who look like they have no life and breathe new life into them.

He can take those who look like there's no hope and give them new hope.

and He can take those whose lives look meaningless and give them new meaning.

God can take what is old and make it new.

it may look ragged at first. it may look doubtful. it may look hopeless.

but God is not phased by what it looks like.

man sees the outward appearance. God sees the heart.

get the ground ready. plant the seed. and wait. 

patiently.

because what God did for life of the potatoes, He'll surely do for the life of you.

"Do not call to mind the former things, or ponder things of the past. Behold, I will do something new, now it will spring forth; will you not be aware of it?" Isaiah 43:18-19


-keep the faith...God loves YOU!!!

-colleen